


The Good Earth

by DiNovia



Series: Home for the Holidays [1]
Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Established Relationship, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-16
Updated: 2015-09-16
Packaged: 2018-04-21 01:27:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4809677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DiNovia/pseuds/DiNovia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Casey sees a ghost outside the window of McNally's and the experience encourages her to seize the day.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Good Earth

**Author's Note:**

> This story is a response story to Fewthistle's piece "Look Homeward, Angel" found here: http://fewthistle.livejournal.com/46545.html

  
At first, she thought the vision on the other side of the big plate glass window of McNally's was a ghost.  No, _the_ ghost.  The ghost of the woman whose footsteps she could never follow in.  They were ephemeral and maddening.  They disappeared like sandcastles in the roaring surf and could not be recreated.  It had taken Casey Novak almost six months to realize that.  Six months for her to make her own path, to lay down her own footsteps.  To walk away from the whispers and the tears of the past and forge her own way.  
  
Curiously enough, that's when Olivia's belligerence had disintegrated and the two of them had begun to build the house of cards that was their friendship in the beginning.  
  
Casey was surprised by the return of the ghost until she realized the snow outside was coating the her in a thin, chilled layer of diamond dust.  Snow doesn't catch in the platinum tresses of a figment of one's imagination nor does it settle on her shoulders like royal icing.  
  
The air in the bar soured immediately.  
  
Her friends' merriment went on around her uninterrupted and the attorney glanced nervously at each one, trying to gauge if any of them had seen her.  Had seen Alexandra Cabot, back from the dead.  
  
Her gaze fell finally on Olivia, who was trading barbs with Munch.  Her bark-brown eyes were laughing and her cranberry lips were haughtily explaining her particular point of view regarding another one of John's obscure conspiracy theories. She had found an unlikely ally in Fin and the two of them were tag-teaming the older detective while Elliot steadfastly refused to join the debate, claiming that the three of them were clearly on their way to being committed and that he preferred to stay out of straitjackets as much as Humanly possible.  
  
And suddenly it was there.  The dilemma.  
  
She and Olivia's relationship had moved well beyond the house of cards stage but she didn't think its foundation was sure enough for something like this.  Yes, Olivia's knee was pressed against her own, its denim-clad warmth all it took to make Casey feel as if she were drunk on champagne and fireflies.  Her smiling eyes lingered here and there; alighting for a moment on the spot where her hand lay on Casey's thigh, dipping to look at the place where the neckline of Casey's emerald green sweater met the swell of a breast, gravitating finally to Casey's welcoming eyes.  But could a few stolen kisses and the hope for something more weather the emotional tornado that Alex's return would no doubt bring?  
  
She was the only one who had seen Alex so far.  She glanced again out the window to the pool of golden light where Alex stood, a porcelain angel bundled up against the frigid weather.  Those ageless ocean-blue eyes were trained on Olivia, watching the detective's every move.  Even this far away, through the haze of smoke and laughter, Casey could see Alex's melancholy.  It matched her own.  
  
 _If I say nothing...  If she just disappears..._   Nauseated by her own selfishness, Casey's eyes shied away from the sight of Alex's longing.  She shifted her weight in the booth and felt the cooler air rush to fill the gap she had made between Olivia's and her body.  Olivia's senses had no trouble detecting the sudden change in Casey's demeanor and concerned eyes sought out the younger ADA.  
  
"You okay?" she whispered, leaning close to Casey's ear to be heard above the din of the guys' laughter as they talked now of past follies and long-remembered rookie foibles.  
  
Swallowing heavily and paling, Casey glanced outside one last time.  She knew what she had to do.  She knew what it would mean.  She knew that everything would change as soon as the words left her mouth.  Even if Olivia and Alex had never truly breached that barrier of polite professionalism, Casey knew Alex had once sat right here--perhaps in this same booth--with her knee pressed against Olivia's while she basked in the older woman's considerable attention and heat.  Would Olivia abandon what she had now to return to what could have been?  How powerful a siren's song would Alex be?  
  
A flash of summer-sky blue met Casey's turned-copper green.  A shake of a haloed head scattered snowflakes to the wind.  A sad smile communicated a single thought: _This is your time now.  Make the most of it._   Then Alex was gone.  Had slipped from her impromptu spotlight to disappear into the anonymity of a New York winter's night.  Fading like a ghost into the mist.  
  
"Casey?"  Olivia ducked her head to catch the ADA's eye then turned to follow her gaze.  The snow was heavier than it had been when they'd come in and she could tell--just by the looks on their faces--which of the hurrying people outside were New Yorkers and which were tourists.  The New Yorkers scowled; the tourists beamed.  But neither the snow nor the passersby explained Casey's sudden distance.  
  
The redhead shook herself gently then looked at Olivia.  "I'm fine," she said and she smiled softly.  "I'm fine.  Really."  She knew one day she'd tell Olivia all about this night.  Or Alex would.  Or maybe they both would, explaining the whole scene in a rapid-fire series of sentences reminiscent of their individual prosecutorial styles.  But tonight...  Tonight she'd ask a question instead.  One bound up in a bright, brassy mixture of caution and courage.  
  
"Hey," she said, her voice catching then clearing.  "Hey, Liv...what are you doing for Thanksgiving?"  She rushed the rest of her question, wanting to get it out before her bravado fled.  Or Olivia did.  "Because I'm going home and Dad said I should bring you if you didn't have anywhere else to go because I guess I've mentioned you to him...a few...times.  Yeah.  So would you like to have Thanksgiving dinner at my Dad's house in Falls Church?  I mean it's not a big deal.  Just, you know, turkey and mashed potatoes and my Dad's cornbread stuffing.  I'm bringing the pies this year but I'm picking them up at Tompkins Square and I think Chris--that's my brother; have I mentioned him before?--is bringing his...um...his girlfriend and her, uh, sweet potato casserole and well...  You don't have to bring anything, of course, but I'd really like it...if you'd go...with me..."  She took a deep breath, her eyes sliding away from the detective's scrutiny.  She couldn't stop the smile on her face, though.  She'd asked.  Whatever Olivia's answer, Casey had actually _asked_.  She felt about nine feet tall and six flavors of brave.  
  
Olivia chuckled and shook her head, her russet hair dancing around her face.  She hazarded a glance at the guys.  They'd moved on to yet another topic--something about football--and they didn't appear to have heard Casey's hastily whispered and haphazardly crafted invitation.  Not that it would really matter if they did.  Elliot already knew that she was seeing Casey.  And if Munch and Fin didn't know...well then, they were damned poor detectives as far as she was concerned.  
  
She plucked a fragile memory from the negligently tended garden she kept at the back of her mind.  A night much like this one but a few years ago.  A similar question asked.  Courage failing her in the harsh glare of Alex's family's status.  Their mutual infatuation notwithstanding, Olivia couldn't fathom herself sitting down to crystal and sterling, to Cornish game hens and oyster dressing served by impeccably starched servants.  So she'd chickened out; said she'd been invited to Elliot and Kathy's, which she had been--but they both knew it wasn't that compelling a reason to decline Alex's invitation.  She'd been asked to join Elliot's family for every major holiday for years now.  One more or less wouldn't have made a difference.  But to Olivia, Alex was platinum and ice-white diamonds while she herself was something much more base.  Like steel: strength extracted from hellfire and useful to a fault but hopelessly common.  She didn't belong at the Cabot's Thanksgiving Day table anymore than Alex belonged in Olivia's mother's dank fifth floor walk-up in Hell's Kitchen.   
  
But Casey...  Casey was copper.  Elemental and earthy.  Useful and lustrous.  Strong but not rigid.  The perfect conductor of raw heat and of electricity, at once exciting and dangerous.  
  
Olivia leaned forward to whisper her reply but got lost in the rosemary-citrus scent of Casey's shampoo.  Her eyes fluttered shut and before she could stop herself, she placed an earnest kiss at the tender spot just below Casey's left ear.   
  
"It would be my honor," she murmured.  
  
When Casey's disbelieving eyes met her own, she grinned and added, "And I'll bring the wine."

_**fin** _


End file.
